H'TOHLD TIA
Guilt is rooted in actions of the past, perpetuated in the lack of action in the present, and delivered in the future as pain and suffering.
A sullen, broody man that was a member of the Path of the Twelve before the fall of Dalamud. He wanders across Eorzea searching for signs of his elusive wife, Mana, who was tempered by Bahamut during the cataclysm and escaped the battlefield. His choices have driven an ever-growing wedge into his relationship with his idealistic fourteen year old daughter.
Job: Red Mage
Alignment: Neutral Good
Affiliation: Scions of the Seventh Dawn
Age: 48
Subjob(s): Dark Knight
Echo-blessed
Patron Deity: Azeyma, the Warden
Birthplace: Gyr Albania
Nameday: 21st Sun of the 2nd Umbral Moon
Personality
Once headstrong and good-natured, H'tohld was deeply traumatized by grief and the events that took place during the fall of Dalamud. He struggles with feelings of guilt and self-hatred, but fails more often-than-not and winds up making terrible choices.
Quiet, contemplative, and fatalistic, he isn't easily riled or angered and tends to put up little resistance when arguing with people. He's much more likely to concede to a point he doesn't believe in than drag out a fight. When it comes to matters of moral code, however, he's more than capable of holding his ground - as long as it doesn't get too personal, that is.
He avoids becoming attached to people, a fear born from a mix of not wanting to impose himself upon them, and not wanting to risk being hurt. Even so, he's unable to walk away from strangers in need and frequently finds himself derailed and roped other people's problems.
Despite his usually detached countenance, in reality he has a soft heart that's easily wounded and oft takes things far too personally.
| Likes | Dislikes |
|---|---|
| Tohka | Allag |
| Doman cuisine | Slimy food |
| Knitting | Parties |
| Animals | Bees |
| Physical work | Idle time |
| Alcohol | Alcohol |
| Sweets | Spontaneity |
| Gardening | Expectations |
Misc information
H'tohld's Echo is present in his right eye as a sort of "veil" that overlays his vision. When he became fixated on finding Mana, he started covering his unaffected eye in order to focus more on the fleeting visions of the past.
Even before Dalamud's fall, H'tohld was something of a worrywart. He imagines the worst possible outcome to things and then frets about it.
He has to wear glasses for comfortable close-up reading.
H'tohld has a complicated relationship with alcohol, like he does with most things. He likes being drunk - especially when he is - but hates himself for drinking as much as he does.
Much similarly, he prefers to eat healthy food and (used to) diet regularly. However, he has a rather large secret sweet tooth and would break his diet almost every time.
Despite leaving tribe life behind, there are some aspects of Seeker culture he never shook, such as the usage of his clan initial. He becomes incredibly flustered when his name is used without it.
Mana was the one that proposed.
He has a naturally introverted personality, and gravitates towards people that force him out of his shell; he's just as comfortable, however, with those whom he can share a comfortable silence.
He hates when his ears and tail are touched.
When he was a child, he was startled by a beehive and fell out of a tree, breaking his tail. It's been kinked in the center ever since, and he still sorely dislikes bees.
background
Early life
Born in 1529 and raised in a Seeker tribe from the outskirts of Thanalan, H'tohld - a young man blessed with the Echo - dreamed of adventure and greater things. It didn't take long for him to fly from the proverbial nest in search of some higher purpose in life, leaving his tribe and the Seeker way of life behind. He continues to use his clan initial because he considers his split from them amiable, and still thinks of himself as a Seeker of the Sun.
He crossed paths with another wandering Seeker - X'rhun Tia - in Little Ala Mhigo, the sole survivor of the recently deceased Crimson Duelists. The older man, bereft of allies and still suffering the effects of the Ala Mhigan civil war, agreed to teach H'tohld the artes of Red Magic.
The two parted ways after some time, with promise to keep in touch and continue learning Red Magic.
The Path of the Twelve
H'tohld eventually caught whispers of the birth of an organization that studied, aided and made use of people blessed with the Echo; the Path of the Twelve. Eventually he was able to catch their attention, and joined ranks as another Echo holder.
He was made Path Companions with an Auri Warrior named Arslang Himaa, and the two of them became fast friends.
Not long after, Arslang's little sister - a lancer named Mana -followed in his footsteps and joined the Path of the Twelve alongside him despite his worry and misgivings.
H'tohld was quickly charmed by her quick-witted personality and kind heart, and commonly wound up dragged along on her harebrained schemes - much to the chagrin of overprotective Arslang.
A year into the Path's activity, H'tohld and Mana exchanged Eternal Vows. Not long after, their daughter Tohka was born. She took after H'tohld plenty in looks, but it was quickly obvious that she'd inherited her mother's fiery personality.
A bright and excitable child, Tohka gave her parents a run for their gil. Arslang doted on her as if she was his own daughter, and quickly became just as overprotective of his niece as he was of his sister.
X'rhun Tia dropped by to visit often during his travels, happy to meet his protege's daughter and impart more Red Magic techniques. Mana even sat in on a few lessons, picking up a trick or two herself.
the calamity of dalamud
When the red moon fell, the Path of the Twelve rushed to the front lines to aid Louisoux against the elder primal dragon, Bahamut.
The fight was brutal, with the forces of Eorzea folding in on themselves into a mockery of a civil war due to legions of fighters falling under Bahamut's influence.
Mana, insisting on staying at the front and lacking the protection of the echo, was one of those Tempered by the dragon's rage. H'tohld was unable to bring himself to hurt her, and watched on in horror as she attacked and killed Eorzean soldiers.
When he tried to force her to stop, Mana retaliated and sliced the hand he'd grabbed her with, cutting off his ring finger in the process before escaping the battlefield after Bahamut's defeat.
After Mana's disappearance, H'tohld returned home heartbroken. His relationship with his daughter began to break apart slowly, and although Arslang was there more often than not to try and mediate, things eventually came to a head. H'tohld was unable to absolve himself of the guilt regarding his wife's fate, and Tohka too young to understand it.
The tense household lasted for almost a year, H'tohld fluctuating between extreme emotional highs and lows. He tried his best to be there for Tohka, but spent most nights wallowing in his own misery and drank often. At one point while they were both inebriated, he begged Arslang to sleep with him. Whether it happened or not, neither of them speak of it.
Tohka railed against him, only becoming angrier when she discovered that H'tohld had been trying to ask the remnants of the Path to track the tempered woman down to kill her, miserable with the idea that Mana was still trapped and likely being used to hurt people. Tohka couldn't accept that there was no possible way for her mother to be saved, and began to hate her father for giving up. She started concocting a plan to run away and chase Mana down, honestly believing that her mother would be able to 'shake off the tempering' if faced with her daughter.
Her attempt was caught by Anslang, and H'tohld realized with horror that she wasn't going to drop it. Tormented by gruesome night terrors of Tohka being cut down at Mana's hands and with the tension in the household boiling over, H'tohld reached a breaking point and decided that something had to change.
Genuinely believing that it would be better for Tohka if he wasn't around, H'tohld left her under Arslang's watchful eye. He set out to look for Mana himself and see the situation ended the way he felt he should have done back during the Cataclysm - even if it destroyed his relationship with his daughter beyond repair.
5+ years later
Although he kept in touch often early on and returned home occasionally, the longer H'tohld stayed wandering by himself the more unstable he became. He fell deeper and deeper into depression with nothing to focus on staying afloat for, and became consumed by the belief that the people he cared for were better off without him. His mission to find Mana was slow-going and akin to searching for a needle in a haystack; every lead he discovered had gone long cold. He lent his aid to the rebuilt Scions whenever they called, although he never stayed long after problems were resolved.
Meanwhile, his absence only seemed to agitate Tohka's explosive anger further. She hated him for not trying to save Mana, and then hated him even more for leaving. Arslang mediated as best he could, but even he caught her ire on occasion.
post-dragonsong war and onwards
Eventually; after the events surrounding Ishgard's dragon war came to a close, H'tohld finally caught up to Mana.
She toyed with him cruelly, and although they fought he found himself once again unable to deal the final blow despite the fact that he'd spent years working himself up to the act. She taunted him for his weakness, once again leaving him behind alive.
Now at a horrible impasse where he realized the truth of his inability to accomplish what he'd sworn to do but unable to bring himself to return home, H'tohld numbly re-gathered himself and once again set out to follow Mana's trail despite the knowledge that he would surely fail again.
Back at his home, Tohka slipped out from under Arslang's watch and ran off, determined to enact her years-old dream of saving her mother. Arslong chased after her, desperate to prevent his niece from being hurt.
Tohka and H'tohld finally met again when they stumbled into each other the next time Mana resurfaced. Tohka, trying to stop H'tohld from hurting Mana, jumped in between them. H'tohld dropped his sword, but Mana's spear never wavered and sliced Tohka's back open. He fought her back frantically, the fear for his daughter giving him the strength to land a nearly fatal blow.
Once again, Mana ran from the field, and this time H'tohld let her go happily in favor of rushing to his daughter's side and getting her to a proper healer. His vercures were enough to stabilize her until they reached the nearest town, where he waited at her bedside in quiet terror.
When she awoke, Tohka was devastated and silent. She asked H'tohld seriously to leave, but without the vitriol and hatred that had become commonplace. He waited outside the healer's home for days until Arslang arrived, checking in with her once or twice and being asked to leave each time.
Crushed by the overwhelming feeling of failure, H'tohld slunk away into the night as soon as he caught wind of Arslang's arrival.
Shadowbringers and the Present
Saving the First and the events that lead up to it brought about a change in H'tohld.
Finally faced with both a situation where he had to rely on the people around him - friends - and what he'd believed at the time to be his own encroaching death, many things were put into perspective for him. In the true acceptance of dying, he realized at the same time that he didn't want things to be left as they were; if he'd continued carrying on the way he was, nothing would ever have changed and only become worse.
H'tohld resolved to begin trying to fix the mess he'd made of his life in baby steps, and finally asked for help so that he wouldn't have to face Mana alone.
He stopped at home to see Tohka, who after some time to think swore no promises but hesitantly agreed to try and talk some things through.
relationships
Mana Himaa
Job: Lancer
Age: 36
A kindhearted woman that enjoys teasing and isn't afraid to stand up for things she believes in. Impulsive, reckless and sharp-tongued, she was H'tohld's polar opposite. She joined the Path out of a desire to protect the people around her.
After being tempered, she shows a frightfully cruel streak. Curiously, she never does deal any mortal blows to her ex-husband.
Tohka Tohld
Job: Pugilist
Age: 14
Fourteen and amazingly light-hearted despite her family's bitter end, Tohka possessed steel will and a single-minded drive to make the most out of life. The "keep on getting up whenever you're kicked down" type. She has a frightful temper, however, although this is usually pointed at her father. She enjoys playing tricks and has boundless energy.
She appears to be a full Miqo'te at first glance, but sports a few easily covered patches of white scales on her back, as well as a pair of tiny nubbed horns hidden by her hair.
arslang himaa
Job: Warrior
Age: 40
Mana's harried older brother, who spends most of his early life chasing after his younger sister; only to find himself running after his niece in much the same way. He has mixed feelings regarding H'tohld; compassion for his wayward friend warring with his resentment and anger at H'tohld's choices.
He cares very deeply for his makeshift family, and doesn't want to lose anybody else.
Ennius morningstar
Job: White Mage; Dark Knight
Age: 32
A fellow Dark Knight that H'tohld meets in Ishgard, Ennius is honest and to-the-point. He oft warns H'tohld out of making bad or worse decisions, sometimes without even realizing that he's doing it.
Ennius struggles with his own feelings grief and loss, a fact that H'tohld admires him greatly for - he sees Ennius as something of a North Star, as someone suffering much the same as him but not allowing it to ruin him.
d'arkh nunh
Job: White Mage
Age: 54
A taciturn Miqo'te man that hails from a tribe in La Noscea. They get along well in only the way that two old men can, taking peace in sharing stories and reading in comfortable silence.
H'tohld holds him in high regard and respect, despite feeling a slight amount of wistful longing for D'arkh's easy relationship with his family. D'arkh encourages H'tohld to repair his own relationships in a softer, kind manner.
rhue'a lenhkei
Job: Summoner
Age: 22
A smart-mouthed, dour young man with enough attitude to knock a platoon off their feet. Oddly enough, he's loudly - and incorrectly - certain that H'tohld is his long-lost father.
Although H'tohld tries to discourage it, Rhue'a shares his proclivity for heavy drinking, as well as a fondness for gardening. Rhue'a boasts a much greener thumb, however.
Rhue'a holds the unique ability to infuriate H'tohld enough to actually snipe and argue like a child. H'tohld is quite fond of him, however, although he'll take that fact to his grave.
y'nbulea khah
Job: Dragoon
Don't ask a young lady her age, H'tohld.
A confident young Miqo'te woman whose bossy attitude hides a caring, thoughtful heart. True to herself, she always says exactly what she thinks without sugarcoating it. H'tohld might grumble if he ever disagreed with her, but would probably do anything she told him to while biting back an instinctual response of "Yes, Ma'am!"
He appreciates how much life she brings into any day, and she's just as good as Rhue'a at getting him out of his head. He worries about the both of them often.
Ardbert
Though the time H'tohld knew Ardbert was short in technicality and they certainly didn't make the best of impressions on each other, H'tohld had been compassionate towards the man's struggles early on and they became tentative friends after meeting again on the First. Though they didn't exactly get along and argued often, in time it warmed into something much more good-natured. They both struggled with feelings of defeatism due to heavy trauma, and wound up inspiring each other to continue as both became ironically frustrated with the traits in the other that mirrored their own.
Though a bit unconventional, Ardbert eventually played a major role in re-igniting H'tohld's sense of self worth and determination - if he could say that he shared a piece of his soul with Ardbert, then certainly not Every part of H'tohld could be worthless, and perhaps he would have to live his own life and fix his own mistakes as Ardbert no longer could.
X'rhun tia
X'rhun had been an old friend of H'tohld's since they traveled to Eorzea together. X'rhun taught him Red Magic when H'tohld was little more than an intrepid young adventurer, and H'tohld has looked up to him ever since. The hero worship faded a bit as they both aged, but there aren't many people whose opinion H'tohld values more.
Mana went out of her way to meet X'rhun due to high praise from H'tohld, often inviting the older man to stay with them if he was nearby.
H'tohld has only seen X'rhun briefly since Dalamud fell, much of which has been avoidance on H'tohld's part.
In an alternate route, H'tohld gets much closer to Ennius as a psuedo Dark Knight mentor.
He accompanies Ennius on occasional quests when the younger man is short on aid. Ennius, suffering from a painfully recent loss himself, strikes a familiar chord in H'tohld's heart and he finds himself compelled to try and help. H'tohld struggles to keep distance between them and stay disconnected, an attitude that begins to frustrate Ennius.
In this situation, Ennius winds up being present for the confrontation between H'tohld, Mana, and Tohka. His advanced healing abilities restore Tohka's wounds on the field, giving H'tohld the aid and opportunity to finish Mana there. When Tohka awakens, Ennius' presence and help pushes H'tohld to reconcile with her much sooner than he would have normally.
Eventually, they get married, and although H'tohld never does understand what Ennius sees in him he tries his best to be someone worthy of that.